It's the little things that I hate....

[Casper]

Even notice that day to day little things can bug you? Usually they are so small that they mean nothing and are never really talked about. But this one is something that I have had occur on me a few times now and, being an idiot, I fall for it the same way EVERY time.

So here it is:

I'm thirsty...normal sort of thing...so I go to the fridge.
Now opening the fridge I see the std bottle of coke in there. We have coke in the fridge all the time, its a caffine thing I guess. Mrs Casper and I both love caffine and anyone who has been to see us will know that a coffee is going to be shoved into their hand pretty quick...or a coke....(or water if your name is Jeff )
This is however, not a normal 2l variety of Coke, its one of those insidious 1.25l jobbies...and its 4/5ths full. Its also laying temptingly on the middle shelf, not in the door like a 2l bottle. Now you would think that this would warn me that what I'm about to do is stupid...and it should.....but I'm dumb.
Being a 1.25l bottle I consider it the "man size" version of a 600ml bottle... or as us lazy people say..."cant be stuffed reaching 1 metre for a glass.:rolleyes:
So I grab it out, lift it up, pull off the cap and swing it up for a good long swig.
I have just started a chain of events that will leave me annoyed and sticky in less than 10 seconds. I've pulled the pin and committed, theres no turning back, its a live grenade of black syrup and I have no chance to stop it now.
I take the first mouthful...sweet, fizzy, yum. As I start to take the second mouthful the full terror of my situation hits me...the gas inside the bottle is expanding....FAST. I've been too rough and the gas in the Coke bottle wants out.
Now at this stage I have a mouth full of Coke and the pressure is building to a point that I have about 3 seconds to make a decision or there is going to be a big problem. The bottle has been on my lips for around 5 seconds...I have 3 seconds to make a decision.
1. Pull the bottle off my lips....this is going to just shake it up more and coke is going to go everywhere.
2. Swallow. No chance, with that pressure its going to explode into my mouth anyhow and Coke will go everywhere and I'll have a belly full of gas...not appealing and probably painful
3. Ride it out. Who am I kidding, the pressure is just too much, somethings got to give and its probably going to be my eyeballs.

So I took option 1, again, for the 136th time in my life. What a mess. I'm not happy.

Hmmm, thirsty again now. Time for a coffee, its much safer, its only scalding hot water mixed with roasted and crushed beans and milk from a cows stomach.

It's the little things that I hate....