car talk @ social gatherings.

[JG3282]

A time on Mirc was interesting
< nva l8 n a 308 > wats ur ride bro
< me > XF Falcon, soon to get turboed
< nva l8 n a 308 > bwahahahaha
< me > what's so funny
< nva l8 n a 308 > my vk commi 5 lita chops xe's ne time
< me > stands to reason a car with a V8 and less weight to carry will beat a tank with a six
< nva l8 n a 308 > them xe turbs at colder are cant even boost when they run a 10 then u can talk 2 me
< me > there's 4 of them that have run tens
< nva l8 n a 308 > as if they have
< me > they have billy 10.40, jase 10.43, john 10.80 and another one in queensland ran 10.3 a few years ago
< nva l8 n a 308 > as if they have
< me > you already said that
< nva l8 n a 308 > last time i saw them they couldn't get boost and were running 11s
< nva l8 n a 308 > they need huge turbs and nos and efi
< nva l8 n a 308 > get a vk commi, add a 286 cam, 4.11s, holley dp and run 10s all day
< me > need a bit more than that to run a ten
< nva l8 n a 308 > ur mama needs a bit more than that

Me: Why don't you put your ute on gas mate?
Bro-in-law: My mechanic told me that ute engines don't run as well on gas as sedan engines do.

Fully sik leb: R31 Skylines are sik moit cos they come out with da holden RB30 engine.

Guy I know: All Commodore from VB to VZ have Nissan engines in them.
Me: I'm no expert on Holdens mate but I reckon only the VL six cylinder engines were made by Nissan. The rest are either Holden or Chev.
Guy I know: You're wrong man, my cousin owns Holden and in 1977 he bought a 50% share in Nissan so he could use their engines.

Fully sik leb: My moits Vee Ell turboss ran 8 seconds on da street with da G-Tech bro. It hooks up betta with slicks down chapz cos Calder is ИИИИИ moit.

Chick I dated once: I did a nine second pass in my stock-ish 2.0 litre Pulsar.
Me: What track was that at and can I see your time slip?
Chick I dated once: Oh it was ages ago at this track that closed down and they asked for my time slip back cos it was the World record.

13 year old Dude from the USA chatting to my younger cousin on msn: Gary Myers shipped his Mustang over here to Dakota so he could chauffeur me to my prom.

Work experience kid: I was doing a driving lesson with my mates mum and she gave me head while I drove 180 k's in peak hour traffic down this piece of road.
*Note: Piece of road was Waverley Rd, Malvern. Notorious for being bumpy, making this story poorly researched for more than one reason

guy I know: Garth Tander is my dad!

guy on ICQ: that guy with the Torana that has the plates RUNRVS is my sister's boyfriend and he's a full on lebbo. I told him to get those plates cos they mean Run Revs!
Me: You sound very well connected
guy on ICQ: yeah I also know the guy with the Torana that has PROST6 number plates. he took me for a run in it and it did 8 seconds, then we cruised chapel. the numberplates stand for Alain Prost the F1 driver and the 6 cos its got a 6.0 litre V8 with a six stage NOS kit.
*Note: RUNRVS stands for "Are You Nervous." I know this cos it was my car. I'm not a lebo and my gf of the time did not have a brother. PROST6 was also mine and in fact was the same car with a different paint job and was not exactly street legal to cruise chapel. It had a six cylinder engine with no nitrous and ran 11.2, PROST6 stood for Pro Street 6

dude I used to work with: My Dad's Top Fuel dragster ran 3.78 seconds at 523 mph and he shut it off at 3/4 track.

same dude: I went to this guys house in Craigieburn today and he was rippin mad burnouts on his next door neighbours front lawn cos he's tuff and the nieghbour is too scared to call the cops.
me: really where abouts in Craigieburn cos I live there. it might be someone I know.
same dude: he lives at number 38 [blank] crescent. where do you live.
me: number 40 [blank] crescent!

bloke: my cars got 360 kW
me: at the wheels?
bloke: nar mate at the accelerator!

bludger: I ran my top fuel dragster at Calder last friday night
my mate: really? my mate takes photos out there and he might have taken some of your car.
bludger: ooohhh actually it was another friday night. there were no photographers there.
my mate: my mate is always there.
bludger: actually it wasn't Calder. I just remembered it was actually at Willowbank last sunday.

cronie: my leb mate's VL was factory fitted with a 3.8 litre V6 and it ran 10.7 at Calder last friday night but the readout boards weren't working and they couldn't give him a time slip cos the printer ran out of paper.

[outback_ute]

Originally Posted by JG3282

cronie: my leb mate's VL was factory fitted with a 3.8 litre V6 and it ran 10.7 at Calder last friday night but the readout boards weren't working and they couldn't give him a time slip cos the printer ran out of paper.

I thought the dog ate it lol

[AUSGTI]

Ahahahahah, that was a crack up!! God there are some ИИИИИИИИИ losers out there

[JG3282]

I love the way ИИИИИ heads talk about their BUICK V6 powered Commodores as if they are a rarity :

[Chris]

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha! good one JG................

[Valknutr]

Originally Posted by JG3282

bloke: my cars got 360 kW
me: at the wheels?
bloke: nar mate at the accelerator!

bwuhahahahhaha
my brothers mate thinks his sisters buyfriends commodore is faster than my car because the speedo goes up to 260 whilst mine only reaches 220 (i think) despite the fact the EA has had work done to it and the commodore only has a fully sik sound system and neons with 18" rims....

[Mechan1k]

There are so many people out there that talk crap.
I have a hard time trying to hold in the laughter ... or i give them enough rope ... and see how far they go ... some people really hang themselves good and proper.

[AnthonyQLD]

Originally Posted by THE_RAVEN

Ive heard a few people talking
about owning a "V6" AU.WTF!

Yeah I get that alot too, e

[EBII Fairmont]

My EB even though it is stock, ran a 2second quarter mile :P.

Too many douche bags out there that think people will believe things like what I just said. Its a good laugh. The funny thing is they think people reckoin they are knowledgable. Just if they knew what is said behind their backs.

[Casper]

My personal favourite is to tell a story (a true one) about something you did in your car. Anything will do, doesnt have to be a good story. One I told was when I lost control on a dirt road in my XD with some friends in the car and managed to slide it sideways between 3 trees. One at the back (less then a foot off the rear bumper), one at the front (about 3 meters in front but REALLY big) and one on the passenger side door (so close that if you leant on it it would actually touch the door handle.. DAMN close).
Anyhow, about a year or so after it happened I was at anouther party (within the same social group but some new people there and some old friends not so plenty of people I hadnt met). Started talking to this guy about cars and stuff, nothing major. After a while he tells me a story about how he slid his car inbetween 3 trees... same story, same location, same amount of passengers (but his friends),different car.

What do you say? :

[Mechan1k]

LOL @ Casper.

Remind him politely of Copyright Laws and to think up some new material (especially if you can remember the date when you originally told your story.) Say it in a kind of a lighthearted way ... and watch their face drop and the expression on everyone elses face.

[TURBOTAXI]

Yeah, all of my cars have been one off factory specials, but they are so secret that ford did not issue any evidence and they deny that the cars are special. *sigh*

[Sprint_ED]

i recon the best is my 18 Y.O cousion, brings this fooly sik wog boyfriend, here was the convo:

BF: that ur car the blue 1
ME; Yeh
BF: that looks sweet man, ill run ya 1 day
ME; What u got?
BF: a VS v6 worked off its nuts, no nos, not blown just NA
ME: what does it do down the quater
BF: 9's
ME: GET NNNNNN, the only way its gunna run that is if its being shot off an aircraft carrier, wheres ya slip???
BF: it does, u ford blokes know ИИИИ, ill prove it 2 ya, well run now
ME:ok
__________________________________________________ _______________
AFTER ME BUSTING HIM BY 5 CARLENGHTS TO 100KM (i do a 14.8)
__________________________________________________ _______________

ME: ИИИИ i must be doing 7's
BF: ok i dont do 9s, i do 13's
ME: man ur still full of ИИИИ, i only run 14.8
BF: yeah but im only running regular unleaded ATM, i did a 13 with premium
ME: AHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

UNCLE: WTF u drive like that with my daughter, ull be doing 6's 2 get away from me

ME: on the floor having a siezure for the next 2 hours

[superpursuit83]

This is gold. :evil_laug

My personal favourite is to tell a story (a true one) about something you did in your car. Anything will do, doesnt have to be a good story. One I told was when I lost control on a dirt road in my XD with some friends in the car and managed to slide it sideways between 3 trees. One at the back (less then a foot off the rear bumper), one at the front (about 3 meters in front but REALLY big) and one on the passenger side door (so close that if you leant on it it would actually touch the door handle.. DAMN close).

Caught a guy out like that myself once, overhead him talking about the time I lost it on a dirt rd, slid it sideways between 3 trees

more pls

[outback_ute]

I thought Casper's punchline was going to be that they then have to come back with a story that tops yours... You know - "oh yeah, well I..."

[Casper]

Nope, no punchline. It was the stupidest, scariest and most insane thing I've ever done in a car. I was only 21 at the time. XD's were not ment to be rally cars. Only thing that saved me was luck. Took over an hour to get the dam car out too.

For the record, was in the Brisbane ranges not far from Little river. Came over a crest of a hill and saw a T intersection up ahead. I think my eyes actually popped out of my sockets..

[Clager_250_XF]

What a laugh i loved some of them stories Back in the day i had a TE gemmy Panno witch had a VS V6 and trans i didnt do to mutch motor work as you could respect it went fairly hard any ways i spent alot of money on the body and sytem it had 18 inch rims, lowered, custom purple paint white leather interiour, 2 screans and 6 15 inch subs ( cheap and nasty Boss subs) in the back of the wagon anywayz here i am at a mates house I was working late and got to his once most people where ИИИИed anywayz one of my mates introduced me to this bloke who was a friend of a friend and told him to tell me about his car he was telling me about his gemmy witch sounded the same as mine wone the same trophies at the same car show as mine and had the same plates you should have sen his face when i showed him my gemmini ;)

[K_Man]

Did hear one guy at a party spouting something about his Proton being 'amazingly stable and so easy to drift at 180km/h'. I just had to walk away.

I do my best not to get into car conversations at gatherings. The constant bulls**t was funny at first, now it's just annoying.

[niko]

Originally Posted by K_Man

I do my best not to get into car conversations at gatherings. The constant bulls**t was funny at first, now it's just annoying.

sometimes its really hard to hold back a "shut the f@rk up"

[TuMor]

Originally Posted by Mechan1k

There are so many people out there that talk crap.
I have a hard time trying to hold in the laughter ... or i give them enough rope ... and see how far they go ... some people really hang themselves good and proper.

Yeah, i love pretending to be dumb about cars and see ow far they go. Definately the commodore drivers who take it just too far.

Anyone else got some ripper stories?

[Mr Cube]

I guy I used to work with used to give me some crakers...

1) He was driving down a stretch of road (Canberra Ave) heading toward Quenbeyan, in his Cordia ( that could do and quite often did 330 no sweat) racing a VL two lanes came around a corner doing about 180 there was a Volvo in his lane, so lucky he was in the left lane and could swerve on to the gravel, where he proceeded to put on his handbrake and go around the volvo sideways and get this he waved to the Volvo driver, then after he had past the Volvo managed to get it back on the road and kept the race going...

2) Same Cordia he used to be a greenkeeper or something was heading up the highway to Sydney cruising at 280 and went past a cop. Cop couldn't catch him so called in a couple more for backup further up the road to stop him, they eventually did. The cop asked why he was going so fast, his reply "Im a greenkeeper and I haven't taken off my steelcap boots and my foot is heavy" apparently the cops all thought that was funny and left him off with a warning.

Was definatly funny working with this bloke. used to come home and tell Jacqui and just once I wished I said to him "Why are you lying to me?"

[Clager_250_XF]

LOL Cordias what a pos ИИИИ they are ha ha ha some times i get so angry cos you know they are bullИИИИing ya and they are incolting you buy the way they keep going thinking you belive them :(